Goodbye Appa!

On June 27, 2020, my family and I said goodbye to the eldest, wisest and kindest member of my family; my dad. He passed away after a long and painful battle with Chronic Kidney Disease.

My dad was my friend, philosopher and guide. We never had the best dad-son relationships, but he did his best to be a great dad. When other dads put their kids into competitive mode from LKG, my dad instead took a different route and gave me books to read. Other dads often taunted their kids if they failed to obtain a top rank in the class whereas my dad always said the main aim of education is to prepare a person to live a complete life. He bought me storybooks and GK books at a very young age and helped me acquire knowledge and mainly a bit of wisdom. I was never a best student and never meant to be one. But I was always inquisitive and had this appetite and drive to learn new things. Looking back now, I have managed to make a decent living only because of the skills that I acquired due to my dad's efforts. He always wanted his sons to become good and knowledgeable human beings and he did a very decent job at it.

I will always remember him as a talented, honest and hardworking person. Life didn't treat him well, but he never complained about it. He always took things in his stride and tried to keep a cool head. He always wanted to help others and did his best job. He was very knowledgeable and often applied his knowledge to good use by helping others: be it giving sound and practical advice regarding investments or career-related advice. The fact that he positively influenced the life and careers of at least 20+ people is a testament of his knowledge, skill and will to help others. During his life, he stood first in College, gained a national rank (Top 10) in the ICWA - Inter exams (something he regretted not pursuing further due to a family situation), was very good at sports - especially cricket and hockey, and also taught himself to repair radios, tried his hand at entrepreneurship and easily moved back into a salaried role even at the age of 50 with limited success. I understand these are not big things, but you need to consider the context in which he achieved it.

He lost his own dad at the tender age of 15 and was left facing a huge responsibility of marrying off three sisters, a burden that he shared with his three brothers. He not only managed to do his duty successfully, but do it with honesty and dignity, never once complaining about the endless hurdles he had to go through (Mind you, the world was a very different one in the 80s, it was NOT kind to the middle class, especially for families that were trying to find a good suitable match for their daughters/sisters).

He also had a flair for writing, reading and becoming an entrepreneur. His burning passion led to him quitting his well-paying job at Godrej and taking on the family business of running a restaurant (Something, which sadly took a huge toll on him and my family).

To put it shortly, it was a decision that he would regret till the end of his life. Having said that, I do not wish to convert this post into a long sad story.

I wished to pay tribute to a man who tried to be inquisitive, learn a lot, and help others. All I want to say is that I am proud to be his SON. I will always regret to my dying day that I couldn't say to him how much I loved and appreciated his support. He may not have been the greatest dad in the world, but he was MY DAD and I will always love and miss him.

Thank you, Aanu (Dad). We miss you. We will always cherish you. and I promise you that the valuable lessons you gave me will always be put to good use to help people and create a great legacy.

I don't know how realistic this goal is. But you told me once that "Getting a job and building a house is NOT an achievement. Creating a business that provides jobs to people is the biggest achievement." I promise you that I will pursue this goal and become an entrepreneur, a very successful one, to achieve the legacy you always wanted. I promise to be a better human being and use my talents to help others.

Most important of all, I will always cherish the most important lesson you taught me - Do the right thing. Be confident of your goals, pursue them at any cost and NOT worry about the results.

I will drive forward our family legacy and establish myself as a great and that is a promise.